But Spelling My Name Wrong?!

Your either a ‘catty person’ or a ‘doggy person’ according to CattyDoggy People. Im both. Although my wife says Im a ‘catty person’. It’s the low maintenance aspect I like; leave plenty of food and water for them when you go away for a few days, if it’s longer, get a cat-sitter to visit once a day, leave Cat-flap open and your good to go.  Although that has changed quite considerably due to the fact that they are now house cats and don’t go out, not because they or we don’t want them to go out it’s just a little fact we have been told since moving to the area “sometimes the coyotes will visit the gardens and THEY WILL EAT YOUR CATS!” Enough said. So there is a lot more poop scooping from the big brown box everyday. Thanks Mr Coyote!

What is it about cats, that when they are sick they will just chuck it up right there on the rug in front of your face, like they have just discovered punk rock,  gained an anti authoritarian streak and acquired an unhealthy dose of bad kitty attitude in one foul scoop. There’s no:

“Excuse me owner-type-thing, but would you kindly fetch me 4 sheets of extra strong kitchen paper and a packet of scented wet wipes, the honey suckle ones, as I am about to be sick and fear I shan’t make it to the Kitty Shitter Litter Box in time? Much obliged”.

They look like that’s the way they would talk, if they could. It’s that silent stare look, mesmerising, always slightly looking up but feels like they’re looking down at you. You know and they know what they’re making you think – dinnertime – and sure enough, as if by black-cat-magic, you get up and trancelike fill the empty bowls and it’s only three o’clock! Two and a half hours before dinnertime!!!

I have made a point, that if they are sick I just leave them to it and  let them get that hairy matzo ball off their chest. I once tried lifting Dolly out of the house because she started retching and I cleverly thought: “Right! To the backdoor and beyond!” Bad mistake. She was like a little set of burst bagpipes full of potato and carrot soup and the sound coming from her wasn’t too dissimilar. The trail went over the carpet, up the back of the chair, across the kitchen table and over the threshold of the back door. When I put her down on the ‘Beware Of The Cat’ matt, she stopped puking, looked up at me and silently said: “That was clever”.

So from that moment on I have just left them to it. Our ex-dog walker reckoned I used to leave the cat sick to dry? I jokingly added “…yes and then I scoop it up like a well done omelette and into the bin?!” (How does she know I used to that?!)                                                       

Ps. What is it with people when they cover their nose at another pets poop and with disgust say:

“Whoah! That is a stinker!”

What do they think it should smell like? 

Chanel No:2?

$3.78c for 7 liners that’s 54c each. Based on 2 Pooping Cats thats 2 liners per week @ $1.08c which is $4.32c per month which is $51.84c per year thats $259.02c for the first 5 years and these guys have got 9 lives so it’s your choice my poop scooping friends.

I wonder could you buy a genetically modified, non-pooping cat for less?